Petrichor

Seven days!!! And not a ray of Sun, What all I had did not matter. Every ounce of me longed for one ray of  it. And now, when it finally brightens the sky, my heart skips a beat. It hurts to see all the snow fall off the leaves. How can I have both? How can I have it all? Yet it seems only that will make me happy. The seasons happen. In time. Every year. How much I want a season to last? Every single time. How much resistance I have to face something new? Yet it happens.  The Sky clearing out  I stood my ground to take it all in.  I just was.  Tried to grasp the world through my senses. For a moment, I was glad I had my camera, then, alas! what camera can see that my eyes do?  O Elusive mind, what are you?  When did you start ruling me? How did I succumb to you? Are you separate from me? Who am I?

There are situations(or even people) that I'd be gladly away from. I am not a loner, but would like to stay away from people who are trouble or who may cause my inner balance to sway. I don't like to get into politics or be a subject of discussion. But, in the last few days I realized. These people or situations are not a bad thing. They are not my enemies. They are necessary so I get out of a few things I need to get out of. All this while, these people or situations caused turmoil to tremor(situation depending) ONLY because I allowed them to do so. It was I that gave them the importance they now have. When I saw this, it brought new strength within. My fear seems to have vanished. I no longer want to avoid situations. There is something to learn & overcome round every corner. I know I knew this all along. What was the difference? Well, it is the difference between knowing something & experiencing it. It is the difference between the mind & the self. Thanks to the ...

What is a thought? I looked up. Says Wiki I was being raided left & right by thoughts during my Surya Namaskars today. I bring back my mind. Another thought! And the process goes on. After a point, I just wanted the mind to sleep or go away somewhere. I used to love psychology all though my later childhood & early adult life. It seemed intriguing. But today, I just did not want to learn the history or geography or the psychology of my mind. I just wanted it to go away so I could do my practices. As Sadhguru says, "You will have to become illogical, uneducated...to understand what I have to say". For once, I am able to understand the magnitude of this statement to some extent. And this comes from a man who can live without any thoughts for days together!!! Our lives these days are dominated by the mind. Definitely not hearts, for most of us at least. The fact is we do not realize it as much. And when realization dawns, it is like, "Duh! What were you thinking?...

that I get these days is simply mind-boggling. I am coming across so many people who are, what do I say,...mmm...different. Way different than what you would expect a normal person to be. On one side I see compassionate people, people with so much compassion that they would leave all they are doing to answer your one genuine question; people who have left a career in s/w(in the US) to settle down with a farm in India; many many more. All these people are so motivating. What's better than being the way to show it? And all of this, I did not know about for so long. I am coming around to believe that if you start looking for something earnestly, that something you will get(maybe something even more). Sometimes, I feel myself wondering. Aren't we all(Indians, Americans, Pakistanis, Talibans) living in the same world? The different continents that was one huge continent millions of years ago? Whom are we fighting at? Whomever we fight with, whatever we fight with, aren't we all ...

I am back after a short visit to my dentist. I was so glad to find a Tamilian-Indian dentist & was trying to explain my pain to her in Tamil. Wow! Though she understood whatever I said, she never said a word in Tamil. Is she breaking any code if she converses in any language but English? It surprises me! I see Mexicans converse in Spanish whenever they meet. Even people from other parts of India converse in their mother-tongue when they meet someone from their land. I am not promoting my language here, nor do I believe in the correlation between patriotism & languages. But come on, a little drop of English sure does not hurt, does it? Or is it just me?