Petrichor

Just fixed a new car. Then the move to the new apartment. So, would be a week or two before we start our travels. In the meanwhile, about Calgary: 1. This city is definitely developing infrastructure-wise. Construction everywhere all the time(maybe they can do it only during Spring-Fall). 2. Calgary seems to be the hub for oil sands, internet & technology. 3. Weather is obviously the best in all of Canada. Never seen no rains here. It is either sunny, cold or it just snows.:) 4. Easy to spot a Canadian. He always ends a conversation with an "eh?". 5. There are pubs everywhere. (a quick reminder: I live in the downtown, eh?) 6. People smoke. More than I am used to. 7. People do not look that they are doing a favour by making a conversation with you. 8. Customer service in banks, offices are way better(than I've known). 9. When it snowed yesterday, we were the only people who were watching it out the window like a natural wonder. People were going about their business a...

It is difficult to put in words what I am feeling. More & more truths surface! Another parallel universe seems to exist...or is this that one? A yearning, to make myself useful. To grasp this entire world. A burning desire to know what the heck am I? And what am I doing in this world? There exists more love than is going around. A horrible feeling that poverty is obscene & I am a part of it as much as the people who are in it. It may seem silly, but by not doing anything significant to eradicate it, I am only being a part of it. And there is no sense of modesty or humility associated. It is blatant truth. As more truths come up, the more I realize that the truth was always there. Dissolution of the I, making yourself a part of this world, the possibility of knowing thy self, everything that once seemed distant, illogical, unwanted, looks possible, within reach. I can never forget my first Inner Engineering class or the subsequent classes I had the privilege of attending. If I h...

around where we live now :) Where we go for a walk everyday(notice the warning for coyotes...I was a little amused the first time I saw it) Where S plays almost everyday - on princess island park I haven't done this city justice through photos. Still settling down. But will post a new entry in the travel blog soon.

I received an email fwd from a friend that read, "Can water be affected by words? Dr. Masaru Emoto, a Japanese scientist, believes so. And he has proof." "Dr. Emoto took water droplets, exposed them to various words, music, and environments, and froze them for three hours. He then examined the crystal formations under a dark field microscope. And he took photographs. The results were totally mind-blowing.", reads the email with lots of pictures of water crystals. I looked up this guy's name on Wiki & I was a little surprised that he is true. :) I looked up his website . Now, from what I read, this guy is not a champ or a pro in what he says. His words may seem illogical & ridiculous too. He may not have credibility to prove his own experiments. But that does not necessarily mean that it is not the truth. What if water does respond to emotions? As the email read, we have 70% water inside. That makes a huge difference if what he says is truth. This is on...

I was a happy Brahmin as a child. Rather, happy to be a Brahmin child. It has got nothing to do with my caste. But it has everything to do with my parents. My parents were really unconventional, broad-minded, service-oriented(with limitations, of course), never-say-go to a temple(never-not-say-go to a temple either). We'd travelled a lot as a family. We have visited most important temples in India. But never once did my father or mother insist that I should pray or do any of the things they believed in(or not believed in). So, I assumed if this is how a Brahmin is, I am happy to be one. At that age, I believed you are never born as a Brahmin. You become one by your actions. Anyone can become a Brahmin. It is a way of life. But with all the things that started cropping up as a part of this religion or caste, somewhere I started experimenting with everything I came across. I had to try it to make sure it worked for me. With time, I started to lose interest in rituals & religion i...

It truly amazes me to know how much accepting I can be when I just don't resist. When I just let things be. This country, Canada & its people are soooooo friendly that words fall short. People at the Federal office really don't need to please people. They don't have the need to bring in customers. Today, I had been to their office to apply for SIN card & I had no palpitations when I met the officers - which is straight opposite to my every single experience in the US. My last name is pronounced close to what it should be & I don't feel familiar or alienated. Fewer people in a city than I'd ever see in my entire life(I'd been to Alaska in Summer- so that doesn't count). The Bow river borders the downtown & for a change the downtown feels relatively safe. The buildings are not as unique as San Francisco, but they are not grey & blue like in Vancouver. I am not ready for Toronto, yet. And so! There is nowhere else I'd rather be now, tha...

Revelations about the move. 1. We were not as ready as we thought we were...for the move. 2. But after the initial jitters, I think we know this is what we want. 3. I am truly happy. I'd rather be here & complain about not being in Bay area than otherwise. 4. Isha has become a bigger part of me than I knew it to be. 5. I need a few more moves to feel more detached, but I am getting there. 6. Money is needed, but is pushed to the very last rung in my ladder. 7. There is divinity in everything around me. I have just turned a blind eye so far. 8. Help comes from unexpected corners, & such help is never forgotten. 9. People are extremely friendly here. Maybe it has got to do with the weather. 10. Me & my family are so darn lucky & I am soooo grateful for that.

For a while now, G has been telling me that my blog has become an Isha blog. Isha has affected us as a family in such a deep way that I cannot help notice the changes. But as I went for my usual walk with S today, I just realized how much we had grown together as people. Being the cashewnut that I am, it helps having a level-headed person such as G around with me all the time. G is never biased. He never cares what I think of what he says. He just says what he feels is right. And I should say that he has made me rethink many decisions. It is not our anniversary, nor G's birthday. But I felt so strongly about him today. The past couple of days, he has been so patient with me, just being there. He probably would not have understood anything, but he was there, supporting me. It meant a lot, then & now. Over the span of our six years together, he has come to be one of my trust-worthy friends. Even if I know he would not agree to what I did, I have the need to share with him. I fee...

Last week, I had a ladies night out. Probably the first in my life. We went to watch "My Name is Khan". I laughed & cried And sang & smiled. For all those out there, I hate SRK. "Some" may call that prejudice :-). But it is a fact. There is nothing unique in that guy. At least from where I stand. I was truly open to the idea of watching this movie with the girls, though. Wonderful company where I could truly be myself. Anyways, the movie started OK. But at one point, where Ammi teaches the little autistic boy about good people & bad people, I cried! And that was not the only moment I cried. For every time when Rizvan bombards Mandira with "Marry me", I laughed! And that was not the only moment I laughed. For the songs, "Sajda" & "Tere Naina" I sang my heart out. And those were not the only moments I sang. And the scene when Khan(from the epiglottis) asks the President for his phone#, I smiled. And that was definitely not...

because, my mother got initiated to Shambhavi a week ago. because, she is feeling ecstatic so, because, I can already see the transformation lo, because, I am able to connect to her in a totally different way, so. Because I am so grateful, I bow!

I was so tired that I was not sure if I would be up until midnight. I had to be somewhere next morn at 7am & I was sure I did not want to wake up the whole night & crash at 6am. When I turned on the webstream from Isha, I was in for surprise. The whole program kept me up, awake & energized & I found myself swaying & dancing & embracing the night to the best I could. I should've known it earlier. It was Isha, after all. What else did I expect? Meditating at midnight with Sadhguru was something I never thought of at last year's Shivarathri. The dogmatic ideas of my logical mind seem to get weaker. Maybe I should toss them out myself :-) Instead of going into the details I can sum it up, "This is one day, er night that was something like never before". Thank you Isha for the oppurtunity. Turned out, a lot of us were dancing to Sivamani's & Vikku Vinayakam's tunes. Absolutely fantastic!

Why do I volunteer there? With Isha? I HAVE NO CLUE. But every time I hear of an IE program in the area, I just have to be there. The one that happened 2 weeks ago was life-changing. Yes. It was like attending the program all over again. The depth of each word said sank deeper. I am going somewhere. I know not of my destination, but I have begun this journey. A journey of self-discovery. When it is such a journey, who cares about the destination anyways. I have let go of(so many of) my mental blocks. I still own quite a bit, but it is probably a matter of time before I can let them go too. I am doing things way over my capacity. Me & G are juggling between things in such an easy manner(& with so much happiness & acceptance), that I find it hard to believe it is me. I am a planning/control freak that I cannot do anything without planning a few dozen times over & over again. The very fact that I am not alarmed by most things(not everything, yet) that happen without my pla...

I am not a big fan of SCIFI. So my initial view on this movie was totally on the negative side. I refused to watch the trailer but made a judgement based on my short-sighted perception. How wrong? Oh, so wrong I was. But when I started getting good reviews from friends, I started reading about it. Looked up that somewhere the movie talks about everything being one energy & how the Navi people live in tune with their world. That one thing made me say "OK" to G who was actually hoping I would turn over to his side. Thanks again to my mother who stayed back home to watch over the sleeping bundle while we hit AMC. The crowds were all oohing & aahing. At 8pm we were in the middle of the long queue(show timing: 8.45pm) that started to take shape. I haven't visited a theatre in almost 2 years. So seriously, I did not know if I would be able to keep myself awake & in one place for 150+ minutes. Then the movie started. I am not sure if the 3D(or even the IMAX) made a b...

I came across this movie somehow. The movie is pathetically made. The Everest 1996 expedition is apparently very famous for being the worst season ever. The movie failed to show important details behind each person. In the movie, the disaster seemed avoidable in simple ways. They made it look that each person was incompetent in whatever they were doing. A classic recipe for no one doing their job. But once I heard that it was from a book, I reserved myself a copy. The book is by far better than the movie. Rather, it depicts the day's events & the history behind everything. These guides, Fischer & Hall were extremely unique people in their own way. Everything seemed to have gone wrong on May 10th 1996. So many people lost their lives. I love mountains, nature & generally adventure. But after reading this book, I had this feeling, "Maybe Everest is not meant to be climbed". Some questions too...Why do people do this? Why to leave behind their family for 2 months...

that I get these days is simply mind-boggling. I am coming across so many people who are, what do I say,...mmm...different. Way different than what you would expect a normal person to be. On one side I see compassionate people, people with so much compassion that they would leave all they are doing to answer your one genuine question; people who have left a career in s/w(in the US) to settle down with a farm in India; many many more. All these people are so motivating. What's better than being the way to show it? And all of this, I did not know about for so long. I am coming around to believe that if you start looking for something earnestly, that something you will get(maybe something even more). Sometimes, I feel myself wondering. Aren't we all(Indians, Americans, Pakistanis, Talibans) living in the same world? The different continents that was one huge continent millions of years ago? Whom are we fighting at? Whomever we fight with, whatever we fight with, aren't we all ...

Just two months after my association with Isha, I found myself sitting on a plane to TN to take an advance course. It was like I had no other option. I just had to do it. I still had to do my Shambavi at noon when I reached IIIS before lunch. So, I took the oppurtunity to meditate in Mahima. I had just seen it from the outside when I just checked myself in. So, after shower, I found myself entering the doors of Mahima. SILENCE!!! There, looking at me was the most powerful picture of Sadhguru. It brought me a chill. When I could finally take my eyes off that picture, I looked up to the ceiling of the dome. I knew immediately. This place is something! I did my Shambavi. When I had to mouth words as part of my meditation, I found the whole of Mahima say it with me in reverberation. Thinking of it gives me goosebumps even now. If Mahima does not move you in any other way, at least the size will! It is HUGE!!! I found some time to hike around the paved grounds. As if I needed more solitude,...

Last weekend, we had to meet up with a couple of old-time friends who were on a visit from Chennai. We decided to meet up for brunch at a friend's place. And I volunteered to cook, ...er..., prepare most of the food. No guesses. I picked up some raw food recipes from our very own traditional "Taste of Isha". I warned all of them that the food was going to be raw & natural. Healthy for sure. Tasty...depending on what their tastes were like. G warned me as the people for whom I was cooking were pretty conservative in their ways of eating, except one. I could say with guarantee that not all of them liked the food they ate, though it tasted fine for my family(including my daughter who just loves the beetroot salad). It did not bother me much because I did not have any expectation. But I had zero guilt since what I made was 100% healthy. Later, a friend was talking about eating chocolates & he went, "I can eat all this food(& chocs) only for 5 more years. Afte...

Long long ago, so long ago, I saw a movie called Speed(maybe when I was in India). I liked the lead actors in the movie, no doubt. Though I was following Neo closely, I came across Miss Congeniality so much later, say a couple years ago. The person that I am has never believed in being a fan or the likes(except when I was at school-crazy age, you see). I love Julia Roberts as an actor. I can watch any movie of hers. But Bullock, maan. She is awesome. Her comedy timing is simply impeccable. I found myself laughing like crazy yesterday when I brought a copy of Miss Congeniality 2. I know the movie did not do very well. Who cares? I've never. Last week, I found myself laughing forgetting even who was sitting next to me. That was while watching "The Proposal". Initially, I wanted to watch the movie when I read that part of the movie was shot in Alaska. But the movie is totally hilarious. Sandra Bullock fits the role to the '.' In fact most actors do. I might find myse...

My dream come true. I've wanted to skate ever since I was 15. I should've tended to it long ago. Nevertheless, me & G signed up for adult skating classes & thoroughly enjoyed the process. I wasn't even sure if I would be able to get up with the skates on. The instructors were pretty neat & there was someone to check on me every now & then. Otherwise, it was the usual exercise around the wall. I fell hard a couple of times(though I was taught how to fall gracefully, never seemed to use it when time came). It actually did not hurt as much as I thought. I had so many people ask me if I was doing ok(which made me think, "Doesn't everyone fall in the beginning?"). I fell. And I didn't care about it. I was skating. Fumbling, yes. But still skating. It meant everything. A childhood dream come true. We plan to continue the classes for a couple more weeks until I can actually skate. It might be too early to try the ice rinks in SF or San Jose for th...

Just read this in the news. So painful! Can a mother do such a thing? Beats me! My sympathies with the boy who survived.